Alpha

Review by Anorexic_Barbie

Release Date

Friday 3rd July 2026

Should I watch this movie?

"Yash Raj Films' 'Alpha' starring Alia Bhatt and Sharvari feels like a hollow, unoriginal attempt at a spy thriller. Is it just a derivative copy of Dark Angel, Nikita and Black Widow!"

Alpha, unleashed today, immediately positions itself as another cinematic endeavor destined to disappoint, reeking of creative bankruptcy from its very premise. The trailer, if it's any indication, reveals Alia Bhatt's character embarking on a familiar quest for vengeance against her adoptive father figure, Bobby Deol, after an obligatory period of soul searching. Deol, predictably, is no ordinary patriarch but the mastermind behind a super-soldier serum program, churning out the ultimate soldier—a concept so threadbare it barely warrants a second glance, especially when one considers the striking, almost blatant, echo of narratives like James Cameron's Dark Angel, which, way back in 2000, already explored the trope of a genetically enhanced super soldier escaping a covert facility. This isn't innovation; it's a rehash, a tired trope recycled with new faces, offering little to suggest any genuine narrative ingenuity. With such a transparently recycled foundation, Alpha appears less like a fresh cinematic offering and more like a predictable exercise in genre mimicry, leaving little doubt about its eventual critical reception.

Prepare yourselves, because if you thought the concept of 'cringeworthy' had reached its peak, this cinematic masterpiece is here to prove you gloriously, hilariously wrong. Our poor heroine, Alia, was apparently snatched as a tot, only to be lovingly nurtured by an undercover Pakistani agent who, naturally, goes rogue with the very sensible goal of bringing India to its knees – well, yeh exactly, rogue or Indian agencies infiltrated, who even knows anymore? What unfolds is essentially a Temu-discounted version of a high-stakes Dhurandhar-style flick, where Pakistan somehow has the upper hand, and Alia, alongside her twin sister Sharvari, must join forces to bring down all the bad guys, but forget James Bond's suits and seductive charm; these two lovely ladies are busy stripping away and dancing in bikinis, because nothing say'international spy' like a well-timed, scantily clad shimmy. It's a plot so gloriously nonsensical, it truly redefines what it means to be utterly, laughably absurd.

Okay, so picture this: Alia Bhatt's character, Sita, is basically the ultimate glow-up, a genetically altered super-soldier who can probably open pickle jars with her pinky, while her twin sister, Sharvari Wagh, is just... you know, normal? Like, how is that even fair? Talk about sibling rivalry on a whole new level! Apparently, Sita's super-ness started way back when her sweet dad, Vikrant Kaul (Anil Kapoor, looking fabulous as always), tried to save her pregnant mom with some 'Alpha serum.' Big oopsie though, because while her mom tragically poof, Sita's genes got a permanent, sparkly upgrade; then, as if life wasn't dramatic enough, she got snatched as a baby by the totally rogue Fateh (Bobby Deol, probably with an intense stare) and basically got a very un-girly upbringing, being trained to be the ultimate, superhuman killing machine—no tea parties, just... target practice, I guess? But hey, it's not all bad! This serum gave her all the perks: extraordinary physical abilities (hello, six-pack!), organs that practically self-repair (no more stressing about that paper cut!), super-duper heightened hearing (perfect for eavesdropping on gossip!), and get this – she can hold her breath underwater for eight whole minutes! Seriously, Sita's got powers that make our morning coffee feel utterly inadequate, proving that sometimes, a little genetic alteration can turn you into the most hilariously overpowered twin ever.

We're talking about the ultimate showdown, and seriously, how in the world is Sharvari, bless her normal, non-serum heart, supposed to throw down with Alia when one of them is basically a human cheat code?! I mean, a biologically enhanced super-soldier, our 'serum angel,' if you will, is going to absolutely mop the floor with a regular human, no matter how many spin classes they've done or how many samosas they've eaten; it's just science, sweetie! Our poor Sharvari, playing Durga, was thankfully spared from all that rogue military madness; her genetics are totally unaltered, she was just chilling in Spain, probably sipping sangria and living her best un-super-soldier life. But then, the drama! When Sita finally has her 'OMG, my childhood was a lie!' moment and discovers the dark truth about her stolen past, she totally flips the script! She rebels against her creepy creator daddy and, in the most epic sister act ever, teams up with her normal but totally kick-butt sister to shut down Bobby Deol's shady operation once and for all. Honestly, who needs a serum when you've got sisterly love and a whole lot of grit to save the day? You go, girls!

A movie spends, like, forever explaining how this 'Alpha serum' is basically liquid superhero juice, making someone utterly undefeatable, and then... poof! All that meticulous setup just evaporates because, darling, what we really needed was a fabulous sister-on-sister showdown! Seriously, who cares if the serum makes one sister basically invincible when you can have Sharvari and Alia serving face-to-face punches? The visual spectacle clearly trumped any pesky little thing like internal consistency, because hello, cinematic drama! And don't even get me started on the background score – it was genuinely nice, and some locations were totally awe-inspiring, but honey, a pretty soundtrack can't glue a shaky plot together. I mean, we should probably just be thankful Bhaijaan Salman Khan didn't make a cameo, because his shirt would've been ripped off in sheer excitement, and we'd have another whole layer of chaos. And the irony isn't lost on me – the very same 'snowflakes' who'd usually be clutching their pearls over 'toxic masculinity' in other films are totally fine with bodies flying by the dozen when it's two women doing the punching. Suddenly, violence is empowering? Make it make sense, girl! So, yeah, ultimately, it's just another classic Bollywood 'don't think, just watch' moment, where spectacle wins and logic takes a much-needed, very long nap.

Yash Raj Films has once again proven its uncanny ability to butcher potential, this time with 'Alpha,' a film so uninspired it feels like a direct assault on the audience's intelligence. Stripped down to its bare, unoriginal bones, the narrative brazenly pilfers from 'Nikita' or even 'Black Widow,' while its 'super soldier serum' premise is a direct, uncredited lift from 'Dark Angel' – a show I recall enjoying immensely upon its initial release, making 'Alpha's' pathetic imitation all the more galling. While one might stumble upon a fleeting moment of passable acting or an enjoyable performance, these sparse glimmers of competence are utterly drowned out; for a grueling two hours and twenty minutes, 'Alpha' is not just a movie, it's a torturous death sentence for your brain cells. By the time the credits mercifully roll, your mind will be numb, leaving you with nothing but the profound embarrassment that a high-profile banner like Yash Raj has once again vomited forth another stale, uninspired dump onto the silver screen.

 

 

 

Oh, the sheer, unadulterated cringe of this movie's Vedic Ramayan references, which are, of course, a transparent ploy to inject the insidious woke virus of girl power directly into the unsuspecting minds of Indian girls, all while simultaneously trying to appease a vast, easily confused audience. One might be utterly bewildered, thinking, "Girl power? In India? What newfangled concept is this?" For instance, many a liberal soul will undoubtedly hail this cinematic masterpiece as a beacon of female strength, completely oblivious to the fact that this concept is about as novel to India as, well, the Himalayas. Indeed, even lines from the trailer, such as the utterly groundbreaking declaration, "Today Sita will burn Lanka," (Hanuman burns lanka) are meant to signify a woman single-handedly obliterating evil without a single shred of manly assistance. And honestly, who could ever have imagined such a thing? It's almost as if our ancient Vedic literature isn't already brimming with tales of female empowerment, like Durga absolutely demolishing demons or Kali Maa slaying thousands upon thousands, making this woke re-packaging feel less revolutionary and more like a spectacularly redundant footnote. So, while the movie might pat itself on the back for delivering a "fresh" take on female power, it's merely demonstrating a spectacularly convoluted way to misunderstand India's own rich tapestry of powerful women, making its woke agenda hilariously, if tragically, unnecessary.

The sheer comedic irony of the YRF Spy Universe attempting to peddle sudden hero female characters as some groundbreaking novelty is enough to make Rani Durgavati herself snort chai through her nose from the great beyond. They parade two girls as India's saviors from evil-doers, completely oblivious to the fact that our history books aren't just filled with female warriors, they're practically bursting at the seams with real-life legends like the indomitable Jhansi ki Rani, who probably didn't need a special serum or enhanced soldier training to make grown men quake in their boots. This Vedic appeasement with clumsy Ramayan counter-phrases isn't some profound cultural nod; it's a cheap reference sale, like finding a 'buy one, get one free' sticky note on a forgotten packet of incense. The only thing that occasionally keeps these cinematic endeavors from flatlining faster than a politician's promise is a fleeting cameo from, shall we say, "Kaboo," I mean Hrithik Roshan, whose brief appearance acts like a cinematic Viagra pill for an 80-year-old, providing a momentary, albeit fleeting, surge of life. Ultimately, by ignoring centuries of actual Indian (Hindu) warrior women who literally out-gunned men, these films don't just flop as entertainment; they commit a historical oversight so laughably profound it deserves its own special participation trophy for missing the point entirely.

Prepare your eye-rolling muscles, because this cinematic masterpiece is so utterly predictable, you'll be calling out every twist harder than a bad wrestling announcer. And get this: for once, Pakistan actually gets to be the villain! I know, right? A total shocker after decades of Veer Zaara and Tiger Zinda Hai lulling us into a false sense of friendship-zone security – truly a bold, groundbreaking move by our visionary filmmakers. Honestly, save your hard-earned cash and your desperate trips to the bathroom; you're better off catching this forgettable flick on Netflix or Amazon Prime, where you can fast-forward through the agony. The character buildup is about as substantial as a wet tissue, the action sequences defy not just reality but also basic common sense, and Alia Bhatt struggles so profoundly as a kick-ass trained soldier that it's almost an achievement in itself. Don't even get me started on those utterly silly articles hyping up girl power – India was way ahead of that curve centuries ago, thank you very much. Mark my words, this movie isn't just going to fade away; it's going to evaporate into cinematic oblivion faster than your enthusiasm for a decent story.

 

 

Cringey Western Woke "Girl Power" Hype

 

It's honestly a bit giggle-worthy how some Western media outlets totally miss the mark, thinking they've just discovered 'girl power' when Indian Hindu culture has been serving up fierce female warriors and goddesses, like the legendary Rani Lakshmibai and Durga, since way before it was, like, a 'thing' in the West! Seriously, while some mainstream films get all 'woke' about their heroines, a lot of the time these characters feel super artificial, like they're just trying to cash in on Western action movie vibes rather than having any real depth. 

 

 

And guess what? Audiences aren't dumb! They can totally spot a fake, preferring the real deal – those authentically powerful women woven into India's actual history and traditions. The whole disconnect is, like, a messy blend of trying to make a quick buck with marketing, some major cultural blind spots, and this one-size-fits-all lens that international media slaps on everything. It's like, Western critics have this huge blind spot, right? They act like a strong female lead is some brand-new, 21st-century invention because, hello, their own stories were, like, all about the damsel in distress for ages! Ultimately, it's pretty clear that genuine female strength isn't something that needs to be 'invented' or forced; it's always been vibrantly alive and celebrated within Indian culture, long before anyone else tried to put a trendy label on it. Hollywood can get away with inventing super-powered women because, bless their historically barren hearts, they'd struggle to list five strong female warriors from the 18th-century Western world without resorting to fan fiction. But India? We've had women out-gunning men without so much as a pre-workout smoothie, making the idea of a sudden hero feel less empowering and more utterly pointless. 

  

Above: Rani Durgavatti 1524-1564  & Damsel In Distress:  Mrs. Mary Rowlandson 1676

 

Seriously, it's just so eye-rolling how Alpha tried to pass off its utterly artificial brand of empowerment when India has been rocking fiercely powerful female archetypes for millennia, from epic warrior queens like Rani Lakshmibai to cosmic goddesses like Durga and Kali. Like, did they even try to look beyond a basic Hollywood formula? Instead of tapping into the complex, strategic strength of our history, they just slapped some girls into a totally generic, dude-bro action template and called it a day – yawn. It's genuinely concerning that this trend teaches younger generations that "strength" means purely physical, loud, and weapon-based, completely overshadowing the rich, organic female leadership and intellect woven into our heritage. Ultimately, Alpha's epic box office fail totally proves that audiences—especially us Indians—are way too smart to be gaslit by shallow Western marketing tropes when the actual product is just, like, utterly devoid of logic, effort, and authentic cultural depth.

Performance

Okay, so while Alia, Sharvari, and Bobby clearly poured their hearts into the movie, you just couldn't help but notice Alia having a tiny bit of a moment, especially when it came to those chunky prop weapons, bless her heart! I mean, a real or even a super realistic replica shotgun is like, seriously heavy and totally front-loaded, making it so awkward to swing around, and bless her heart, you could visibly see the lack of weight distribution and heft in her arms when she wielded it; a biologically altered super-soldier should obviously handle a shotgun like it's a feather, but it ended up looking like the weapon was totally controlling her instead! And oh my goodness, the awkwardness of her getting on and off the motorcycle completely shattered the illusion of her being this elite, lifelong-trained killing machine; it completely lacked that fluid, aggressive muscle memory you'd totally expect from a seasoned action star, making it a bit of a giggle. Honestly, it was just a little too noticeable and completely pulled you out of the fantasy that she was this super-tough, effortlessly cool operative.

VFX Team

OMG, you guys, have you ever noticed how super dark those high-octane action sequences are in big-budget masala films? Well, spoiler alert: it’s totally not just for moody vibes, it’s actually a super sneaky little trick to cover up a whole lot of production shortcuts! All those impossible flips and superhuman jumps? Girl, please, they’re not actually defying gravity; it’s all thanks to extensive rope and pulley rigs, and those low-contrast, dark environments make it way easier for the VFX team to magically erase those wires without anyone being like, "Wait, what was that sparkly line?!" And get this: when everything is all shadowy and fast-moving, editors can totally cut between, say, Alia Bhatt and her professional stunt double without us even noticing! Like, who can tell faces or body silhouettes in the dark, right? It's genius, but also, so devious. Oh, and the best part? If a punch misses by a mile or a kick looks a little bit like a sleepy tap, that dark lighting and rapid camera cuts totally blend it all together, making the impact look super real, even if the actors are, like, totally not actual martial arts masters. It’s like a little magic trick to hide all the oopsies! So next time you're watching a dimly lit fight scene, just remember: it’s probably less about gritty realism and more about those filmmakers being total sneaky little devils, totally pulling a fast one on us with their darkness! Wink wink.

Box Office Failure?

Oh honey, Alpha has truly made an entrance into the YRF Spy Universe, but unfortunately, it's less of a grand red carpet moment and more of a quiet whisper, registering the lowest opening in the franchise's history. Bless its heart, while a ₹9.12 crore first day at the domestic box office might be sweet for a standard film, for a mega-budget spy flick that usually aims for a dazzling ₹30-50+ crore, it's giving "underwhelmed." The theatres were practically hosting private viewing parties during morning shows, with occupancy rates barely hitting 9-17% – talk about a lack of ground-level excitement! Even with a global pull of roughly ₹24.03 crore over its opening window, it feels a tad… modest, especially when you consider this darling was produced on a heavy budget of ₹130-150 crore, thanks to those fabulous actor fees and all that extensive VFX work. So, while it's not an outright zero, Alpha is undeniably facing an uphill battle steeper than trying to run in heels through quicksand to recover its massive budget, leaving us all just a little bit speechless. Between the illogical super-soldier physics, the noticeable cover-up lighting, and the overall predictable lousy writing, the word-of-mouth has simply hurt its momentum. Trade analysts on platforms like the r/bollywood_boxoffice community predict the film might wrap up its lifetime theatrical run at just ₹50–60 crore. If those projections hold true, the film will be a certified box office flop!

Main Cast

Alia Bhatt, Sharvari Wagh, Anil Kapoor, Bobby Deol

Production

Directed by Shiv Rawail. Screenplay by Soumil Shukla, Shridhar Raghavan. Dialogues by Ishita Moitra. Story by Uday Chopra. Produced by Aditya Chopra

Music & Soundtracks

Rohansh and Abeer Pandit. Score: Sanchit and Ankit Balhara

Run time

2 hours 20 minutes

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